Tuesday, January 30, 2007


Let's Call Them "Republican Americans"

by itsandy

So the Republicans have decided that we should now be called The Democrat Party. It sort of sounds like "rat," so that's fun for them.

I've heard plenty of good retorts, from The Republic Party, to Republican'ts, But I say we should call them Republican Americans. And their party should be called The Republican-American Community.

It has that same awkward political correctness of "African Americans." And like that phrase, there’s absolutely nothing technically wrong with it. But used just the right way, it drips with the subtle condescension that says, "Hey, you’re Americans too, just like us, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise." Not convinced yet? Let's see how it works in context:

Start with these examples:

"Last night we had dinner with a lovely Republican-American couple who moved in next door. They’re from Charleston, I think. Really nice couple. But their daughter looks half-Democratic, so we’ll have to get to the bottom of that one."

"I asked them what’s their favorite Republican-American restaurant, and without hesitating, they both said, ‘Chick-fil-A.’"

"Newt Gingrich, a prominent Republican American and former congressman, was surprisingly critical of his own community after the 2006 mid-term elections."

"Senator Kerry did his best to court the Republican-American vote, even staging a photo-op at a Chick-fil-A restaurant. But most Republican Americans remained skeptical, saying it smacked of pandering."

"Most Republican Americans, when pressured, will candidly admit that white-collar crime is not an American problem, but a Republican-American problem."

"Police have few leads in the stock fraud case, but say the perpetrator was a Republican-American man, age 50 to 60, balding, of average height and weight. If you see a Republican-American man matching that description, you are encouraged to call the number on your screen."

"Critics of the tax break say it unfairly benefits Republican Americans, for whom government assistance has become a way of life."

"President Obama vetoed the earmark, saying ‘The best thing we can do for the Republican-American community is to stop reinforcing the soft prejudice of lowered expectations.’"

"He signed the veto while surrounded by a handpicked cadre of Republican-American supporters at a local Chick-fil-A restaurant."

It's working for me. Add your own. It's fun.

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